Not Pete Holmes, though I kinda wish I was.


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I do that in my standup, too. That’s a great Hannibal Buress thing, he told me that when most comics bomb, they look down. He does the opposite, he puts his head up. We’re trying to interpret the audience. We think we’re good at it, and sometimes we are, but sometimes we’re wrong. Sometimes they’re just a little behind you, maybe just a little tired. Sometimes the guy before you had a similar joke. I see a lot of comics jump too quickly into that bombing place, where they’re like “Fuck you guys” or “Fuck me, I’m not good.” Sometimes, if you just don’t get nervous, you slow down and don’t get that flop sweat, they’ll come around. Something I learned from T.J. is that there’s a way to riff with yourself, to create opportunities and be honest and really funny. There’s always a play. I think that’s why it feels so bad to bomb, especially if the guy before you or the guy after you does really well. There’s a nagging feeling of, “I know there was a combination to that safe, and I just didn’t find it.” Some people are just better at finding it that night. Their number came in. I’ve had nights where I was the one guy who got them, and then the next night I’m eating a bowl of cold dicks again. —Pete Holmes talks to Byron Graham during the High Plains Comedy Festival (via chuckledresignation)

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It just didn’t work out. I was 22 when I got married. 22. The same age I was when someone asked me to draw a map of the world and I just straight up forgot South America. —Pete Holmes on his failed marriage [x] (via cinemaria)

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Gabbin’ like gals

Grace saying cooter on TV gives me life 

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(x)

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chelcperetti:

If you befriended me for comedic relief and only turn to me as a source of entertainment then get the fuck out of here I’m not a tertiary character in a teen comedy I’m a person I’m not here to entertain you fuck off

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Bo Burnham on The Pete Holmes Show - 3/5/14

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I do that in my standup, too. That’s a great Hannibal Buress thing, he told me that when most comics bomb, they look down. He does the opposite, he puts his head up. We’re trying to interpret the audience. We think we’re good at it, and sometimes we are, but sometimes we’re wrong. Sometimes they’re just a little behind you, maybe just a little tired. Sometimes the guy before you had a similar joke. I see a lot of comics jump too quickly into that bombing place, where they’re like “Fuck you guys” or “Fuck me, I’m not good.” Sometimes, if you just don’t get nervous, you slow down and don’t get that flop sweat, they’ll come around. Something I learned from T.J. is that there’s a way to riff with yourself, to create opportunities and be honest and really funny. There’s always a play. I think that’s why it feels so bad to bomb, especially if the guy before you or the guy after you does really well. There’s a nagging feeling of, “I know there was a combination to that safe, and I just didn’t find it.” Some people are just better at finding it that night. Their number came in. I’ve had nights where I was the one guy who got them, and then the next night I’m eating a bowl of cold dicks again. —Pete Holmes talks to Byron Graham during the High Plains Comedy Festival

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